Second in the table a good 23 points ahead of us, second highest away scoring record in the division, second best away record in the league, a goal difference of 31 compared to our -4, Tom Pope way ahead of the scoring charts on 27 in all comps, 13 clear of our Rene and for a team who rarely string a couple of bad results together ( they haven't won in their last 2 so 3 is unheard of ), you could be forgiven for thinking that saturday's visitors to TQ1 would fancy their chances of leaving the South West with all 3 points.
We all know i am referring to Port Vale and for them, promotion looks a formality with a 7 point and game in hand cushion over 4th placed Burton Albion. The Burslem men will look to take advantage of the complete Benny Hill show that has been Torquay United for the last 3 months or so and on paper this task looks easier than Katie Price, however as i have said so, so many times before - THE GAME ISN'T PLAYED ON PAPER! Just to add though than whenever i have said that we've lost so someone give me a sheet of A4 and a football NOW!!!! :rules:
What we have to bear in mind is that we have a new boss in charge, albeit temporarily, and although we all expect a good hammering in this game nobody can be certain given the 'new boss' factor. The lads could quite easily play like Brazil and out of nowhere produce a result totally out of the blue. Stranger things have happened including Gazza admitting that he has a 'chicken bucket' addiction and that he only drank to mask this embarrassing fact. Also Jedward being able to make money despite being the epitome of annoyance, totally talentless AND being body doubles for Bananas in Pyjamas.
The arrival of former Scunny boss Alan Knill could herald a change in fortunes for the men in yellow and why shouldn't it begin on saturday? I've got to be completely honest and say i'd be shocked if it did but who knows? For me, a draw in this would represent a huge achievement and i'd bite your hand off for it now but we can safely say that the real work starts at Plainmoor on tuesday evening against Wycombe Wanderers. Did i mention i was going to that game? Well, i'm going to that game. £200 nearly all in it is costing me and did i tell you that i'm actually going to that game? Anyway, i'm going to that game so just incase you nipped into the kitchen to put the kettle on or had to go upstairs for a plop or let the cats out to go and defecate on next doors garden then may i say that i'm going to that game. So just to reiterate for those that didn't get it 7th time around, i'm going to that game. 8-]
We are all guessing what side Knill will put out or indeed what formation and so i guess amongst all this doom and gloom comes a little chink of light, a tiny morsel of excitement about going down to Plainmoor once again with a sense of anticipation and wondering what to expect. If Taylor were still in charge then the gate would be low, everyone would have expected a dire game and a heavy loss and they would have been right. Now we just don't know. I'm not suggesting we have suddenly improved in a few days to the extent we can beat probably the best team in the division IMO, all i'm saying is that anything is possible now. Barnet drew 0-0 with them at Underhill and Morecambe beat them 1-0 at Vale Park so why can't we beat them?
Vale have taken the league by storm and under the steady astute stewardship of Micky Adams they have put aside their off field issues by mounting a serious and sustained challenge for the league 2 title. They have Tom Pope who we all know about, tricky midfielder Jennison Myrie-Williams who is their 2nd top scorer on 9 goals in all comps, Ashley Vincent who has 8 goals, Louis Dodds is on 7 along with striker Ben Williamson and they have a host of scorers on 4 or less.
Defensively they have 2011's player of the year John McCombe, ex Blue nose Darren Purse, Adam Yates, captian Doug Loft who is a superb player IMO, Joe Davis and Welshman Richard Duffy. Goalkeeping duties fall on the shoulders of ex Shrewsbury and Preston stopper Chris Neal.
In midfield they boast Jennison Myrie-Williams, Ashley Vincent, Rob Taylor, Chris Shuker, Sam Morsy and Trinidad & Tobago international Chris Birchall who played for his country in the 2006 World Cup in Germany. In attack they have signed Lee Hughes who not only was convicted of death by dangerous driving in 2003 but also he ran away from the scene. It goes without saying that if Torquay had signed him then i would no longer be a supporter of our club until his departure and i'm sure a few of you may hold the same opinion. He has scored 4 goals in 6 appearances. They also have Louis Dodds, Ben Williamson and obviously Tom Pope.
I'm sure Vale will bring with them a healthy following so perhaps we will open the away terrace to them for this one. Although Vale have a varied selection of knobheads amongst their fanbase, some of which i encountered during my visit to Vale Park earlier in the season, the majority of fanbase are friendly and Vale will always have a place in my memory. Not because i love the place, that would be silly as anyone that has been to Burslem would have to be certifiably insane to think that but because they are the team i first saw play at Plainmoor in my inaugural matchday experience. It was the back end of last season and we won 2-1. John McCombe thundered one in for them in the first half but we cam back with 2nd half goals from a Howe penalty after their man was sent off and then Jarvis bagged the winner. In addition, as i had been to Vale Park that season for our 0-0 draw it meant that Port Vale were the first team i had seen Torquay play both home and away in the same season. Magical days, i'd still rather win the lottery but magical nonetheless. Also magical is the fact that i have seen us play Vale 4 times, 1 home and 3 away and i have yet to see us lose.
The one thing i am glad about is it looks like Vale are going up, not because i want them to do well but because i've been to Vale Park the last 3 seasons, it's getting boring now, the ground is pants, the view is poor, it's always clinically depressing in the away end as it's always dark. Whenever i go i have to load up on serotonin so i don't cease to function. There is nothing in the immediate vicinity other than a bookies and they charge a fiver to park. It will be nice to not have to go again next season and enjoy Hartlepool instead. ( or Tamworth should we be relegated ).
Vale suffered a 1-0 reverse at home to Morecambe in their last game and here is the line up:
1. Chris Neal (gk)
2. Adam Yates
3. Darren Purse
4. Richard Duffy
5. Daniel Jones
6. Doug Loft ( captain )
7. Jennison Myrie-Williams
8. Ryan Burge
9. Ashley Vincent
10. Tom Pope
11. Lee Hughes
SUBS: Rob Taylor UNUSED, Chris Shuker ( on for Yates on 78 mins ), Sam Morsy UNUSED, Chris Birchall UNUSED, Louis Dodds UNUSED, Calvin Andrew ( on for Vincent on 81 mins ), Ben Williamson ( on for Hughes on 69 mins ).
The referee for this one is Keith Hill but i'm not sure football league rules allow individuals to be referees and also managers of teams in the same league. I'm sure Rochdale's chairman wouldn't be happy about it either. :~D
His assistants are Mr Richard Hulme and Mr Richard Huxtable with the 4th official being Mr Michael Mullarkey.
All i can say to the people of Torquay and surrounds is get your arses down to Plainmoor for this one, give your full support, welcome Alan Knill into the fold and lets get something moving at the club. Don't expect miracles in this one and go expecting defeat, you may end up pleasantly surprised but if not, it is what you expected right? We need all hands on deck now and i've even had a word with Captain Birdseye to get his nautical chuff down to Plainmoor for this but he says he'll be far too busy at a fish processing plant in Immingham gutting a tonne of Gurnard. His loss.
My head says a heavy defeat in this but my heart just hopes we can somehow miraculously get a win. I'm going with my heart, 2-1 Torquay. No messing. Let's have it lads come on!!!!!
Anyone interested in their fans forum can visit:
http://www.onevalefan.co.uk/forum/index.php
Not sure how to do that as a link sorry.
Can i just finish by saying that the Wycombe home game on tuesday, i'm going to that one you know. Don't know if i've already mentioned it somewhere but just incase, i'm going to the Wycombe homegame on tuesday just to let you all know.
although I may call it even after letting you wear the Chris Todd shirt in that charity match! =D 
