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cambgull wrote:Actually, you can all keep your Cats, Tables and Chairs. I have the winner. Ice Cream Vans, I want one.

Yeah but I bet you would silly in an icecream van without the chair to sit on when you drive it around.
Come on it's chairs.!!! besides. How would you have managed to comb your hair without the leg off one

I wouldn't have to drive around in it, I'd have it parked outside my house so I can have a constant use of it.























And a confusing queueing system which leads to my basement with a door which can only be opened from outside... Muhahahahahaha.

Your not into enticing young boys into dark rooms are you, "Here sonny. Come and have a nice Ice Cream"

Not yet, no! :devil:

Got an interview in a few hours at the Cats Protection League! I will tell them and you lot once again that cats ARE great and ruled the earth before human habitation. :~D :na:

austrianandygull wrote:Got an interview in a few hours at the Cats Protection League! I will tell them and you lot once again that cats ARE great and ruled the earth before human habitation. :~D :na:

you need some sort of professional help. still.

If you fail Andy you can join my table appreciation society. You can have a menial position like Junior Executive Vice President.

That is most kind Steve, i will only accept the position upon you revealing to me your vast collection of assorted tables, other wooden furniture items and sundry accessories such as lamps and drawer handles.

Shocking news just in Andy. See the cats v tables thread for a link.

It turns out that cats are in fact just murderous bar stewards. I knew it all along!

Arrrgghhhh Nnoooooooooooooooo! A Cat has been chosen as the new token for the monopoly board. its definatly open war now!!!!!

Make sure you visit Totnes when you're next down this way Andy.

http://www.torquayheraldexpress.co.uk/B ... story.html

stevegull wrote:If you fail Andy you can join my table appreciation society. You can have a menial position like Junior Executive Vice President.

You actually call that Menial. I would make him junior vice Table leg for the next poor orphaned table that came into our wonderfull Tables apreciation society where abused table can live out a life of relative peace relaxing in the knowledge that they don't have to have orrible cats jump all over them.
Please give generously to this worthy cause. They are deserving of a decent life away from the abuse of families who would use their tables to throw food around. Spill untold pints of cold milk on and never wipe up after. They have such a hard life.

This idea is actually not a new one and using pets as therapy is quite a big business. I've tried it in order to calm myself down, i even got 4 cats but they're all f*cking useless so i turned to drink instead.

One of my cats smells of rain and has breath like an uncleaned wheelie bin and when you stroke it you have to use swarfega immediately afterwards. She is called Vienna and i rescued her from a particularly brutal area of Sheffield. If i had left her she would either have been someones dinner, someones football or been cooped up in a drugs den being forced to listen to crap.......sorry.....rap music all day. I say i rescued her, she lives with me now and so i'm not sure if she has been.

I can't stand dogs. Dirty smelly animals...

Gullscorer wrote:I can't stand dogs. Dirty smelly animals...

You're not wrong! In a lot of cases that's just the owners!